Who among you remembers “Thank You For Being a Friend,” the opening song of the classic sitcom “The Golden Girls”?
This show, still shown on multiple channels (I get it on Hallmark), has become an eternal lesson on living, especially after our first decades have passed, when we felt we knew just about everything.
I was fortunate to be in my 30s when I became addicted to the sitcom about three women in their 50s who shared a home in Florida, along with one of their mothers, who certainly was a character in her own right.
Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur), Rose Nylund (Betty White), Blanche Devereaux (Rue McClanahan) and Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty) became role models.
People who were dealing with the acceptance of growing older had a show that spoke to them. The show made the point that there was much to enjoy as we contended with the challenges of aging, just as there is at any age.
The wisdom mixed with humor, often biting, helped us laugh at ourselves while laughing at them. The ageless show continues to teach us how to age with grace, yes, but also how to wring every precious moment out of just being alive.
The opening song told us the major secret to living long and well: doing so with friends. When we are younger, we have jobs, coworkers, children at home and responsibilities like school and lessons during this period of constant on-the-go insanity.
Later in life, we have more time to enjoy these golden years with our friends. Earlier in life, we have friends, but for many, it is our immediate family that fulfills us and that we turn to for support.
We traveled through our lives and related with different friends as we moved and changed jobs, perhaps even marital status.
I vividly recall how my life changed after my first divorce. Somehow, as a single mother, I didn’t seem to fit in with many of my friends who were still married. Many couldn’t relate to my new challenges, and so new friends with similar circumstances came into the picture.
This feeling became even more dramatic when I joined the group no one wants to join: being widowed. What a crash course that is on change. Your major support system is gone, and you are a unit of one in a world that likes to go by two.
“The Golden Girls” gave us examples of divorced and widowed women and the challenges they faced. Again, they did it with humor, which, all my life, I have known is often the best medicine.
It can be a way to get through challenging times. The power of the show was the example of how these very different women found each other and formed their own type of family.
Knowing they were not alone, this newly created bond helped them greet each day. That is the wonderful thing about friendships. As we age, having a strong circle of friends not only helps make our lives more fun and interesting, but it also actually helps our health.
In my work with Alzheimer’s and aging, it is stated repeatedly how important socialization is to our mental and emotional health and well-being. Our families are often busy dealing with the more hectic stage of life we just went through, and can’t give us all the time we would like.
Plus, our lifestyle and needs changed, and it is wonderful to talk and do things with others who, pardon my pun, are all in the same boat and trying to stay afloat.
A recent article from AARP highlighted the fact that people coming together to make life more affordable, sharing responsibilities and caring for each other is on the rise. Once more, “The Golden Girls” shared one possible option for living the best life in our senior years.
With a strong group of friends, there is usually at least one who is up when others are down and can offer a helping hand.
“The Golden Girls” showed the viewing public that growing older is not the end of the world. There are still many doors yet to be opened in life.
In fact, freer from some responsibilities, you now have more time to explore the things you once yearned to do: read more, paint, write, take classes, garden more, take up photography, learn how to salsa … you get my drift.
As the old saying goes, we can either choose to look at a glass as half full or half empty. Certainly, “The Golden Girls” show us that there can be gold in our older years.
I loved how stylish the stars of the show dressed, how they cared for their appearance. They set an example that has stayed with me all these years later. We feel better when we try to look better, being our best true selves. Of course, those golden girls had beauticians, money and wardrobe people.
Another issue often covered in sitcoms was that romance does not have to be part of our past, unless we want it to be. Watching their dating life was funny. When I did a bit of dating later in life, I found some of the scenarios depicted were not that far off.
Hope is the most important thing that makes us get up each morning, no matter what age we are. I am thankful that “The Golden Girls” live on in syndication to remind us that each age in life has the potential to be brilliant.
In the future, I hope to deal with more issues about aging. If you have ideas or areas of concern, please email me at dingramthurston21@gmail.com.
